Thursday, June 7, 2012

TRYING FOR BABY AGAIN




I was in my shop and a friend stopped by with her 6 months old baby. She said her and her partner thinking of trying for another baby and I became a bit worried for them and started advising against trying so early. I told her to wait longer until baby was at least a year or two, using some scientific evidence of two year gap in order to recover her strength; I even mentioned to give as much time as possible to her first child; but the worst thing was I just got my friend back after she stopped breastfeeding and I am actually looking forward to nights out in town and few glasses of Prosecco.

But then after she left I felt really uncomfortable about my advice and thought about it a lot. So this is a bit strange to write about such personal thing but it’s on my mind and I will just go ahead and do it.

I have two happy and healthy children and It is so important for me to say how blessed and privilege I feel to be their mother. Our youngest is four and it is no secret to say that we have thought and spoke about having more but we kind of know that why try our luck when we so happy with two, and there are so many women that can’t have one.

I am so quite simply terrified of trying.  For me trying after my first has meant so many months of anxiety, loss and sadness and I think of all the things that might happen and all the things that could go wrong on the road to a healthy pregnancy.  But then I am calmed thinking that there are millions of women getting pregnant everyday and it may not take months and months of anxious waiting. 

Its becoming normal to have smaller gap between children simply because we have children later and later in our life’s, in my shop majority of first time pregnancies are over 34. “No wonder” it’s only take’s us Forever to get our career on track and in many cases to find the man with whom to have children.

So I suppose the answer is complex and I still feel bad for advising my friend against it. If you worried and thinking when is the good time, that is probably anytime and if “That Is What’s On Your Mind” as soon as you find strength to deal with what ever difficulties may or may not be ahead.

At last, I would like to mention how happy I am to know that NHS IVF treatment will be extended to women up to 42 years of age. What a smart thing to do…..

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