MY SURVIVAL GUIDE - BIRTHDAY PARTIES

It is natural as parents to want our children to enjoy themselves as much as possible. And when more than at their birthday party?! All this stress and pressure to have a good time can often lead to tears and frustration, and I don't just mean for your kids (I think I've cried for one reason or another at just about every party I've had)! So I decided to push my anxiety a side and plan a birthday party for my 6 and 3 year old that I thought they'd truly enjoy. If you too are embarking on the planning of one of these much anticipated events I have compiled a few lists of things I think will help so that your little one has the time of his or her life, so that your nerves stay intact and you might actually enjoy the experience! But let me preface this by saying, even if you do everything right there still might be tears. The important thing is to stay positive and remember this is a celebration however bizarre it might turn out!

Guide to Planning the Party:

Theme of the moment. Think about a theme or themes that makes your child happy right now. I say right now because we all know that our children's interests seem to change on almost a weekly basis. So try not to plan the party too far in advance, a month is a good amount of time. Whether it is Thomas the tank engine or Barbie go with whatever makes them happy and try not to get caught up in how much you like the theme. The theme can be incorporated into games, decorations, costumes, party bags, food, cake, invitations and activities. For example if you have a super hero theme one of the activities can be decorating a cape with stickers and glitter. This will not only help on the decision making for all these areas but also help you stick to a consistent color theme (example: red and blue for Spiderman). I may be all for making the kids happy but nothing wrong with a party that's aesthetically pleasing too!

Planning the food. No matter what time of day you have your party, children always need to eat! The first rule of planning food for a party though is getting rid of any guilt you may have if you decided not to bake all your own food! I promise you its okay! If you do decide to cook, try not to kill yourself because it is unlikely you'll be able to keep the party goers attention long enough for them to really eat a meal and what is most important is that you have energy to play with your toddler throughout his or her special day. Whether making at home our buying in go for two types of dishes: Intensely nutritious foods combined with intensely naughty!

Even better if you can combine the nutritious with the delicious (see the cupcake recipe below). Some other ideas are chocolate covered fruit, chocolate covered pretzels, pineapple chunks w/ cheddar cubes on a toothpick, mini anything from sliders to mini-pizzas to catch the toddler's attention. If you can make the display enticing by placing the carrot sticks in a happy face shape for example, all the better to grab the children's interest. Anything to get a bit of food in before their blood sugar dips too low and crankiness sets in. Also, be sure to have enough sensible beverages around but definitely stay away from sparkling drinks. But while it is important to try and pack those vitamins in I do also think there are a few days a year (at least) when we should literally let our wee ones eat cake and don't fall victim to people giving you a hard time about this....as my Mother in Low would say cake is an essential food group!

Timing. Make sure the party isn't too long so that the kids don't get over tired. I would say anymore than 2 hours is too long. I also advise having the parties earlier in the day so that the anticipation of the day doesn't get the best of your toddler (or you). Early parties also leave time for a necessary nap in the afternoon even if your wee one has dropped their usual nap.

Don't over or under schedule the party. Let free play first while all the children arrive and then the activities. I suggest planning a certain amount of time doing each thing - 15 to 30 minutes; an activity is usually long enough with singing and cake/cupcakes as the grand finale.

Presents. if you can manage it I suggest waiting till after all the children have left to open the presents. It is hard for the other toddlers to not want to play with the new toys and this can be doubly hard on the birthday girl or boy. Sharing is always tough but with new presents even tougher. I've learned from experience that it’s a bit much to ask and no one wants to spend a birthday disciplining. Why not have a table out of the way at the party where guests can leave presents and only bring them to your wee one's attention after everyone has left. It will be a nice activity for the second half of the day.

Gift Bags. gift bags are a nice touch at the end of a party but you don't have to go crazy with spending a lot of money. Stickers, crayons, coloring books go along way and can be themes just like the party. Be sure not to fill the bag with anything that could be a choking hazard as toddlers often have younger siblings. Do make sure you make a few extra gift bags though in case people bring brothers and sisters.

Keeping track of the gifts. Do try and keep track of who gave your toddler what. However, don’t let perfection get in the way of good intention and if you don’t manage to do so just make sure to send a thank you note to everyone even if you aren’t exactly sure what they gave as a gift. When you are writing the thank you cards it is my policy that if you are writing to the parents then it should be from you (with perhaps a nice wee scribble or masterpiece depending on how you are looking at it, from your toddler), and if it is to the children then it should be from the child even if you are writing it.

Rules to Surviving the Party:

Make sure to give your wee one a large healthy breakfast. I’m a big fan of oatmeal because it is likely their next meal will be icing based!

Don't force your toddler to take part in party activities. It will make them anxious and they will join in when they feel ready and with the right amount of positive encouragement. Sometimes it can all be overwhelming so give them time to adjust to all the people and all the hype.

Be sensitive to your guest’s allergies and ask people to notify you if there is one you should be aware of.

If you are inviting children from your toddler’s nursery either invite all in their class or less than half to avoid any feelings of being left out by other children.

Plan a relaxing afternoon post party activity and even if your toddler no longer takes a nap go for a stroller ride or car ride to get them to take a snooze and get their energy back.

Keep some of the snacks your toddler likes in your bag just in case they need an emergency dose. You never know when the all that icing might even be too much for them.

Most of all don’t’ worry if it doesn’t go according to plan, it almost certainly won’t. Just say positive and remember no matter what this is your toddler’s special day and quiet simply you are just happy to be able to spend it together.

Here’s a great recipe for delicious red velvet cupcakes that are also packed with goodness, but remember from one crazy busy mother to another, don’t feel guilty if you just decide to buy them instead. Enjoy!

RED VELVET BEET CUPCAKE RECIPE

Ingredients 3/4 cup beet purée 1/4 cup milk 1Tablespoon whole plain yogurt 1 Tablespoon good balsamic vinegar 2 large eggs 1/2 cup melted butter or canola oil 1 Tablespoon pure vanilla extract (or you can use vanilla bean infused milk) 1 cup brown sugar 3/4 cup flour 3/4 cup alkali free dark cocoa (60%+) 1 teaspoon baking powder 1/2 teaspoon baking soda 1/4 teaspoon salt 1/2 cup crushed walnuts 1/4 cup crushed flax seeds To Make Cupcakes

Preheat oven to 350 degrees

Combine dry ingredients and set aside

Combine wet ingredients and mix in mixer until smooth

Add dry ingredients to wet ingredients slowly and mix until incorporated

Place batter in ungreased cupcake pans with cupcake liners

Cook at 350 degrees 15-18 minutes until toothpick comes out clean

Top with cream cheese frosting

Makes 18 cupcakes

To Make Beet Purée

If you use fresh beetroot cook them in the water first and then trim ends, scrub the peel off the beet, dice and puree.

To Make Cream Cheese Frosting:

Take 2 packages of cream cheese place in bowl and mix with a mixer until whipped

Add 2 tablespoons of vanilla and beat until smooth

Coats/Snowsuits on children in cars, is it safe?

As the cold winter approaches, we start to look for out child s next winter coat, be it that duffle from Boden or the snow suit from Petit Bateau. Never a thought did I give to the thickness of the coat or how that could affect my child’s safety in the car. Did you know that thick winter coats or snowsuits can compromise your child's car seat safety.

In order for a baby car seat or toddler booster seat to function properly, the straps need to remain tight against the child's chest. Winter coats and snowsuits make car seat safety difficult because they change the way a child fits into the car seat. When the car seat straps don't fit the child properly, there is a chance the child could be ejected from the car seat.

The car seat harness needs to stay close to the child's body at all times. All coats and clothing will compress in a crash, but thicker winter coats and snowsuits could compress enough to create a lot of slack in the harness, allowing the child to be ejected from the car seat.

Check All Winter Coats for Car Seat Safety

It's easy to check and see whether a baby's winter coat or infant snowsuit is too thick to be safe in a car seat. This test will show you how thick the coat is and how much the coat will compress during a crash.

Take the car seat into the house.

Put the winter coat or snowsuit on the child.

Put the child in the car seat and buckle the harnesses as you normally would before car travel. Adjust the straps to the appropriate fit for your child.

Put the child back in the car seat and buckle the harnesses again, but do not tighten the straps.

Take the child out of the car seat without loosening the straps at all.

Take the coat off your child.

If you can fit more than two fingers under the harness at the child's shoulder bone, the coat is too thick and is not safe for use with the car seat.

Raspberry Leaf Tea

Raspberry Leaf tea is one of those pregnancy topics which most people talk about but does anyone really know whether it’s for real or not?

Raspberry leaf tea, also known as red raspberry leaf, is a herbal remedy. It is not the same as raspberry fruit tea!

Red raspberry leaf tea is recommended during pregnancy because it contains vitamins (C, E, A, B complex) and minerals (magnesium, calcium and iron) which not only helps mother and baby get all the nourishing nutrients they need, but can also help replenish stores of the mother after birth.
Raspberry leaf also contains the alkaloid 'fragine' which is said to strengthen and tone the muscles of the uterus, helping them to contract more efficiently during labour. Research has found that taking raspberry leaf tea during the weeks prior to delivery helps to shorten the second stage of labour by making contractions more effective. Sipping raspberry leaf tea during and after the birth is also said to help the uterus contract back down to size, reduce after birth bleeding and help initiate the let down of breastmilk. While there hasn't been a huge amount of research into this area, the general consensus does seem to be that drinking raspberry leaf tea during the latter stages of pregnancy can help to make for a 'better' labour with few side effects.
However, because there is little research the certainty of these claims cannot be verified.
What we do know for sure is that raspberry leaf should, like other herbal teas, be drunk in moderation. Some midwives think it is not a good idea to take anything that might interfere with your labour, after all we are designed to give birth without any help, as hard as that may seem at the time!
If you do decide to try raspberry leaf tea, let your doctor or midwife know that you are planning to drink it. And really, whilst we’ve reached no real conclusion here, the best advice would seem to be like anything in life, moderation is the safest way to go. Oh, and I also think it should always be taken with a big slice of cake.

Festivals with kids ....

Let's be honest .... music, arts and creativity aside, festivals are like great big playgrounds for adults. Never have I escaped so hedonistically and had so much fun than I have enjoyed at a festival. I haven't done one with my children yet but they are getting to the age now (and I'm getting to the age where the partying should really be slowing down) where I'm thinking it might be ok to try one. But I know to 'do' a festival, responsibly, with children has to be seen in a completely different light. You have to accept that your festival experience will be different and if you're not prepared for that to be so, then you should leave the kids at home. You are going to miss out on a few things, you won't be able to party like it's 1999, get drunk and giddy by 2pm in the afternoon, or stand right at the front of your favourite band or DJ set. And you will have to shelter your kids from the many dodgy aspects of a festival; large crowds, loud music, drink, drugs and weird people! If you accept all of this right from the start, you and your kids could have one of the best holidays of their lifetime. Here's a few tips which I'll be taking on board on my first festival experience with the little one;

1.Choose carefully - there are so many festivals now, it's one of the things we English do better than anyone else in the world, so take the time to research which ones are more suitable for kids. They probably won't be the big boys with huge headlining music acts, but more compact and full of creative acts with theatre, crafts and world music. Most have their very own 'kids area' which you can check out on the website before you commit. Some festivals are completely unsuitable for kids, so don't just rock up without having done the homework.

2.Take plenty of your own food and snacks, things which you know your kids will eat. If you're expecting them to stay up a bit, or a lot, later than usual, they'll need frequent fuel and stuff they like is so much more comforting to them. It can also get really expensive relying on the food stalls.

3. Take some comfort - this might sound totally obvious but when the tiredness kicks in kids need security and comfort. So take a favourite blanket or a few home comforts, pillow or cushion, to help them chill out whilst still enjoying being away from home.

4. Take a potty! Loos at festivals can be hardwork even for us adults, and so for children can be quite an ordeal, especially as the night gets later. Having a potty or bucket, even for older children, will make the experience much less stressful ... if you don't need to use the toilets, then don't bother.

5.Have a chat about getting lost. What and where should your child go if they lose you? Write your mobile number on your child's arm with a permanent marker, rather than a wristband which could fall off.

6.Pack for every possible weather condition, sunny, windy, rainy ... sunblock, hats, shades, waterproof wellies, sandals. If you're prepared for anything it won't matter what gets thrown at you. And lets face it, it probably will.

7. Don't even try to get right to the front of any music act. For one thing, large crowds can be really scary for small children and hard to get out of quickly. And another, loud music is extremely damaging to young ears, and old. Stand well back and enjoy it from a distance, children like dancing too so this gives them some freedom to move around and be silly!

8. Give your child time to do what they want. Take them to the kids tents, give them a couple of hours of their stuff and then they'll be happy to give you an hour to go and see your band or whatever else you'd love to see. Remember it's more about them this time, but if you make it about them, you can bank a few hours for the grown up stuff.

9.Most importantly, Enjoy it! Let them stay up later, allow some raucous behaviour, accept a few tantrums (this isn't the time and place for the naughty step) let them be wild and free ... it's a festival, it's a holiday and it's a chance for you to all escape to a wonderful world, that for just one weekend is nothing like reality. That sounds like a little slice of heaven to me, anyone coming to Latitiude?

The Super foods during pregnancy

It's easy when you fall pregnant to eat twice as much as your usual quota, plus a bit of whatever you like on top. You're eating for two, so why not? Well, whilst you are eating for two, you need to be aware of exactly what your number two requires in order to be as fit and healthy and you can possibly make them. Plus, it will make your life during pregnancy a lot easier. Here's a quick list of some supersonic foods which will do just that:

Eggs - did you know that eggs are a great source of Vit D? Very few foods contain it, but eggs do! VitD strengthens your immune system, which is typically lowered in pregnancy, so it can help to ward off draining illnesses like colds and flu. It also helps your body absorb calcium for you and your baby.

Spinach - we all know, thanks to Popeye, that Spinach is high in iron, but did you know that if you eats lots during pregnancy it can prevent the very common anaemia? It is also high in folic acid, which helps your baby’s spinal cord develop healthily.

Nuts, especially cashews - a great source of protein and dietary fibre, and brilliant to snack on.

Wholemeal Bread - sounds obvious but it really is a great way to boost your calorie intake and keep your energy levels up (it's a source of magnesium which helps your body absorb energy from food).

Chickpeas - or houmous! A great snack and super delicious, chickpeas are high in calcium, which is essential for your baby’s growing bones.

Blueberries - bursting with Vit C and can be enjoyed as a snack, sprinkled over breakfast cereal or even in salads.

Salmon - omega-3 fatty acids are especially useful in pregnancy; omega-3 is vital for the nerve and brain development of your baby. If you’re veggie or just fancy a healthy snack, pumpkin seeds are just as good as they also contain good amounts of omega-3.

Of course this is just a guide and so long as you're getting a varied diet with a mixture of superfood goodness, there's no reason why you can't indulge in the odd chocolate eclair .... because a little bit of what you fancy always does you good!

The perfect holiday for children

The family and I ( 2 grown ups and 2 young children, 6 and 4) have just had a wonderful weekend away at the very gorgeous Centre Parcs Longleat. If you've never experienced a Centre Parcs holiday, or even a holiday with the kids in the UK, then this is a great place to start.

Longleat Forest is part of the stunningly beautiful Longleat Estate which has rolling hills and magnificent Giant Redwood trees. You have the option of using bikes, walking or catching the land train, which is exclusive to Longleat Forest. It's a breath of fresh air which the kids revel in and we as parents need! There are so many activities for the kids to do (indoor too if you happen to get the worst of the British weather), there really is never a dull moment. There is even a Spa offering relaxing treatments so you feel you can truly relax into a holiday.

Have a look for yourself at the many things on offer, and I promise you the kids will love it and you'll have achieved the perfect family holiday. We did.

The fashion of smocking

Smocking, if you didn't already know, is an embroidery technique used to gather fabric, allowing it to stretch. It was used before elastic, on details such as cuffs and necklines in clothes where buttons were undesirable. It has an interesting history - developed in England back in the Middle Ages, and worn most commonly by labourers, which is particularly interesting given it’s intricate work and, I think, really pretty effect.
Smocking requires lightweight fabric with a stable weave that gathers well. Cotton and silk would be the favourites then, although according to Good Housekeeping: The Illustrated Book of Needlecrafts, "Any type of fabric can be smocked if it is supple enough to be gathered."
We have a number of girls dresses which boast smocking, take a look here and here. They make wonderful occasion dresses, for weddings, birthdays and christenings. Proof indeed that the times are changing again, and a long forgotten art form is coming back into vogue.